Improve Your Communication: 3 Core Components Of Active Listening You Need To Follow
Improve Your Communication: 3 Core Components Of Active Listening You Need To Follow
Good communication isn't just about being able to get your words across; it's about being able to hear and absorb what the other person is saying. Your ability to listen often gets overlooked as a necessary skill, but it definitely plays an important role in maintaining healthy and happy relationships. After all, communication is a two-way street that should require equal parts talking and listening.
But there's so much more to it than just hearing the words. If you really want to do it right, you should be practicing active listening. Active listening is the purposeful and intentional act of trying to understand the words coming out of someone's mouth instead of just letting them go in one ear and out the other. It's all about:
- Making sure you stay attentive and listen closely
- Doing your best to express empathy and connect with what's being said
- Absorbing the information and responding in the best way you can
If all of this sounds new to you, but you're looking to improve your communication skills with your partner, your friends, or your family, we'll walk you through it.
Pay Attention
Step one, of course, is heading in with the right mindset. If you know you're about to have a conversation, it's about choosing to want to listen and giving the person opposite you your complete attention. Don't let distractions get to you or allow your mind to wander - it's more obvious than you realize and it immediately tells the person talking that you're not listening.
Try to note down any physical cues, too! Remember, people communicate not just with their words, but with their facial expressions, and physical gestures as well. The whole body tells the story, so make sure you're giving them the eye contact they deserve, and noting down anything else that might be contributing to what they're trying to get across.
If you want someone to open up to you and speak freely what's on their mind, you have to show them that you care. And the best, and sometimes only, way to show that yourself is by listening intently and letting them know you genuinely want to hear what they have to say.
Try To Connect
Now that you're fully paying attention to every word that's being said, you now have to take things to the next step: try to understand. Being able to recite and repeat what was said doesn't show that you were actually listening, it just shows you have a good memory. That's because active listening is all about trying to express empathy with the speaker.
Does anything they're saying resonate with you? Do you want to know more about this certain fact? Look for bits and pieces that really stand out to you and try to find ways to engage later on. By doing this, not only are you showing the speaker that you're truly empathizing with their words, but this allows you to be engaged and feel more deeply what they're saying as well.
Give A Response
Last but not least, when they're finally done talking, remember that it's not your turn to talk about yourself quite yet. All those notes you've been taking? It's time to respond and reflect on what they were saying. Instead of sharing opinions on your own thoughts, try to provide feedback on what they said instead.
Whether it's asking for clarification on parts you didn't understand, voicing sympathy or agreement on parts you did connect with, or simply asking questions that allow them to elaborate further, doing any of these shows you were actively listening and are fully engaged in the conversation. It's not a one-sided talk; it's a back and forth where the two of you are trying to get to a conclusion by respecting and listening to one another. Now that's the way to do it!