There’s this theory out there that every successful long-term relationship goes through a total of six phases, starting from the moment two people start dating to the decades-long companionship most often associated with older couples.
Sure, it's not all sunshine and rainbows, but these phases are crucial building blocks to creating a healthy, functional, long-term relationship.
To learn about these steps, read on.
The Honeymoon Phase
Most often seen with newlyweds and high school romance, the honeymoon phase is wonderful as a partner but annoying for everyone else.There’s a desire to be with the other, bound up in a ball of love and affection, and does their best to meet their partner's needs whenever and however they can.
The Reality Check
This usually comes into play after a few months or years of this lovesick era, and usually comes hand-in-hand with bickering, seeing each other's flaws, and finding things that were once cute and annoying.
This time of your relationship is the beginning of the make or break. Can you accept your partner's flaws? Can you communicate with them when things aren’t going well? How do you manage frustration together?
If the answer is well, you’re set up to get through the next two phases. If you’re not, there’s a long road ahead of you.
The Power Struggle
This is the first big clash you’ll come into when you finally realize that building a life together is a lot harder than it looks. It often comes with disappointment, intense arguing, and feelings that you’ve made the wrong choice.
This make or break time is stressful in any relationship, but also worthwhile. It’s a time when you both learn how to communicate, make time for each other, and get a grasp on what you both want in life.
The Rebuild
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Sure, you’re not all over each other or texting each other when you’re separate, but things feel better. The worst seems to be over, after some very intense, in-depth conversations about what your expectations and priorities are from each other as well as in life.
This is when the phrase “love is a choice, not a feeling” comes into play. No, you’re not experiencing a whirlwind romance, but what you do have is something sturdy, something stable - or you’re at least getting there.
The Deep Love
Here you both are. Two people that despite everything, have chosen each other. Again, it’s not exciting, but it is real. You make time for one another, listen to one another, and give each other space when it's needed. You are not one whole, but rather two people that have put a lot of hard work and effort into creating a foundation that will last for years to come.
The Legacy
This final phase usually comes at the end of a parenting cycle, but is a time for you and your partner to reflect on a life well-lived.
This time is about partnership and cohabitation. You know that someone is there, and that someone knows about everything there is to know about you. Here, you get to spend your final years or decades in pretty joyful bliss, knowing that together, you’ve weathered about everything life has thrown at you.
