10 Disrespectful Things To Stop Doing In Other People's Homes & 10 Ways To Be A Better Guest
10 Disrespectful Things To Stop Doing In Other People's Homes & 10 Ways To Be A Better Guest
Are You the House Guest People Dread?
Every home has different rules, and sometimes, it’s hard to know if you’re crossing boundaries. Should you take off your shoes? Should you bring flowers? Are you allowed to touch that? Don’t work yourself into a tizzy! We’re here to break down the worst things a house guest does, and a few tips to score a second invite.
1. Arriving Empty-Handed
Many hosts don’t require anything from their guests, but that’s no reason to show up empty-handed. Sure, they probably have dinner and drinks taken care of—and it’s common courtesy not to surprise the host—but even a simple bottle of wine goes a long way. Of course, not every visit warrants a gift, but make sure you play it by ear.
2. Snooping Through Their Stuff
Visiting the bathroom isn’t an invitation to snoop. Even if you don’t think they’d mind, how would you like it if someone went through your medicine cabinets? Opened all your drawers without permission? Snooping is a huge breach of privacy, and it’s no way to thank your friend for their hospitality.
3. Feeding the Dog
Oh, look! An adorable dog begging for table scraps! Fido knows how to work the room, but don’t feed him unless given permission. The last thing you want is to upset his stomach, leaving owners to deal with the repercussions. You also never know if a dog is allergic to something.
4. Ignoring Shoe Rules
Some people ask for shoe removal at the door. Others don’t care if you traipse through their house. Whatever the case may be, adhere to the host’s wishes. It doesn’t matter how clean your shoes are—their house, their rules!
5. Helping Yourself to the Fridge
Unless you were given the green light, don’t just rifle through someone’s fridge. Hosts plan everything from appetizers to drinks so guests won’t need anything, and helping yourself to any old thing is pretty disrespectful. Homeowners then have to replace anything consumed, which might not seem like a big deal, but it is for your friend!
6. Touching Things
Whether a fancy dinner party or a simple get-together, try not to touch stuff. Some people don’t care if you look through their books or admire knick-knacks, but other people prefer items in their place. If you want to check something out, it’s always safer (and more respectful) to ask first.
7. Putting Your Feet on the Furniture
Hey, hey, hey. Feet off the furniture! It’s easy to assume your friend won’t care, but many people don’t appreciate dirty shoes on their grandma’s priceless table. Always ask first, and don’t get heated if the host turns you down.
8. Leaving a Mess
You’ve eaten delicious food. You’ve had refreshing wine. Now it’s time to clear the table—yes, we mean you! Even if your friend objects, at least offer to clear the plates. There’s no reason to leave everything to your hospitable host; they made dinner, but they’re not the housekeeper.
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9. Overstaying Your Welcome
Visits don’t come with a schedule, but the air shifts when you’ve overstayed your welcome. Keep an eye out for classic curtain calls: the dishwasher being loaded, lulls in the conversation, and stopped music all signal it’s time to head home.
10. Bringing Uninvited Guests
Don’t push your host’s hospitality. Just because they extended an invite to you doesn’t mean you can bring the kids or show up with another guest. If you have any plus-ones in mind, ask ahead of time—but it’s usually better to ignore the inquiry altogether; invitations only include you.
You don’t need finishing school to become a perfect house guest! With some no-nos out of the way, let’s explore a few simple ways you can make your host’s life easier.
1. Help the Host
Offer to clear the dishes. Help them set the table. Ask if they want you to bring dessert. You have a thousand ways to help the host, and though they’re small gestures, they have big impacts. Even simply engaging with other guests can give the host a little breathing room!
2. Bring Something Along
Hosts plan the perfect dinner party well in advance—but don’t let that fool you. More often than not, they wouldn’t mind if their guests brought dessert or homemade bread to break at the table. If they decline on side dishes, it’s still kind to bring a gift; flowers or a bottle of wine always go over well, and they show your appreciation.
3. Ask for the Rules
Do they want shoes off at the door? Would they like you to keep the noise down? Follow whatever rules your host has in place, even if you don’t agree with them. If you wouldn’t do it in your own home, don’t do it at theirs.
4. Show Up on Time
Hosts go out of their way to ensure a great experience, so do them the courtesy of on-time arrivals. There’s no such thing as “fashionably late” when the table’s set and the appetizers congeal. While you don’t want to show up early either, arriving at the set time is just good manners.
5. Inform Them of Dietary Restrictions
Don’t leave your host in the lurch—inform them of any dietary restrictions beforehand! Friends usually accommodate picky eaters, but there’s a difference between making simple meals and avoiding allergic reactions.
6. Clean Up After Yourself
We’re not just talking about the dishes. Don’t leave water all over the bathroom counter. Try not to track mud onto the floor. Recycle any cans or bottles you finish. Those little gestures are just common courtesy, and they take the load off your host.
7. Mind the Children
If the host has kids running around, don’t rile them up before bed! Depending on how close you are to the host, you can even offer to take over some parental duties. Spend some time with the rugrats, escort toddlers down the stairs, or just be kind when you see them.
8. Offer to Host Next Time
After a terrific visit, it’s only natural to host next time! Extending similar courtesy not only alleviates some social pressure, but it also shows your appreciation. It’s okay if you don’t want to host, either; you can always take them to dinner as a special treat.
9. Be a Good Conversationalist
A good guest loads the dishwasher—a great one keeps the conversation rolling. Believe it or not, good conversation is a big part of get-togethers, and engaging with guests helps the host. Make merry with anyone in attendance! Engage them, ask insightful questions, and be sure to include anyone on the sidelines.
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10. Thank Them Afterward
When you’re friends for a long time, you don’t always remember to thank them afterward. Well, consider this your reminder! While we’re a big fan of handwritten thank you notes, a simple text gets the point across just as well.
