Set the Tone Before You Speak
Work is a place where words travel fast, stick around longer than you expect, and shape how people perceive you. Sure, you might not always want to sound stiff or overly professional, especially if your culture supports a more casual environment, but you do want to speak with enough care that your message lands the way you intend, and you should still remember that you represent the company you work for. Some of the phrases in this list aren’t technically “forbidden,” but they’re risky because they often come off as dismissive, defensive, or unprofessional, even when you don’t mean them that way. From “that's not my job” to “I don't care,” here are 20 things you should avoid saying at work.
1. “That’s not my job.”
Even if it’s technically true, this line can make you sound unwilling to collaborate. People hear it as a refusal rather than a boundary, and it can shut down problem-solving. A better approach would be to clarify what you're responsible for and the limits of your expertise, but what you can still do to help, as this offers a path forward.
ANTONI SHKRABA production on Pexels
2. “I’m just being honest.”
This phrase often reads like a shield for bluntness rather than a commitment to being truthful. It's fine to be straightforward, but phrasing it in this way can make the other person brace for criticism instead of hearing your point. If you need to be direct, state the feedback plainly and respectfully without announcing it.
3. “Calm down.”
This might seem like a harmless thing to say, but it really depends on the context and tone. In certain situations, such as in the case of a disagreement, telling someone to calm down usually has the opposite effect; it can come across as condescending, especially if they’re raising a legitimate concern. Instead, try acknowledging what you’re seeing and asking what would help move the conversation forward.
4. “We’ve always done it this way.”
Saying “we’ve always done it this way” signals resistance to change and can stall progress before ideas are even considered. It also implies that past decisions are beyond question or the scope of exploration, which isn’t a great look in a modern workplace. If there’s a reason the old way works, explain the reason rather than leaning hard on tradition.
5. “That’s a stupid question.”
Even if said as a joke, it discourages people from asking for clarification, and can also create a culture where only the loudest or most confident speak up. You’ll get better outcomes by welcoming questions and answering with patience and eagerness.
6. “No offense, but…”
When you say this, people know what’s coming next probably won’t feel friendly, no matter how you frame it. The disclaimer doesn’t soften the impact; it mostly highlights that you’re aware it might sting, and even then, you're still going to say it. If you need to address something sensitive, be thoughtful and specific without the preface.
7. “Ugh, I'm so hungover.”
You might mean it as a joke, but it’s an easy way to look less reliable than you actually are. Some people will laugh, but others will file it away the next time stakes are higher. Swap it for something neutral like “Rough morning, but I’m on it,” and keep the details to yourself.
8. “I can’t do it all by myself.”
This is often true, but it can come across as uncooperative and lazy without offering a clear ask. People may hear it as venting or refusal, especially if they don’t know what support you need. You’ll get more help faster if you specify priorities, timelines, and which areas you might need someone else to cover.
9. “I didn’t have time.”
Sometimes you truly didn’t, but this phrase can sound like an excuse without context. It may also raise questions about planning, time management, priorities, or follow-through. You’ll come across stronger if you briefly explain your constraints and propose the next step.
10. “That’s above my pay grade.”
Sure, there might be instances where you can say this as a joke and it can be funny in the right moment, but it can also signal disengagement from the problem. Colleagues may hear it as a refusal to collaborate or take initiative. If a decision isn’t yours, say who should weigh in and what you can contribute.
11. “It’s not my fault.”
This phrase can make you sound defensive, even when you’re right about what happened. It shifts the focus from fixing the issue to assigning blame, which usually slows everything down and comes off unprofessional and even immature. You’ll land better if you state the facts, name the constraint, and say what you’ll do next to resolve the conflict.
12. “You’re wrong.”
Telling someone they're wrong invalidates their experience and often escalates conflict. Even if you disagree with their conclusion, you can still respect their perspective and the ideas they bring to the table. Instead of refusing them outright, try asking what specifically feels more applicable to them and respond to that.
13. “I told you so.”
It doesn’t solve the current problem and usually just adds embarrassment to the situation. People become less likely to bring up issues with you early if they know you'll only rub it in their faces. Focus on what's been learned and how to prevent hitting the same roadblock next time.
14. “It’s not a big deal.”
What feels small to you may be significant to someone else or to the business. This phrase can minimize legitimate risks, emotions, or workload concerns. You can keep things grounded without dismissing them by saying what you think the impact is and why.
15. “That’s impossible.”
Absolute language closes doors and can make you look rigid and uncooperative. Often the real issue is time, budget, scope, or resources, so it’s more constructive to name the constraint and suggest what would make it feasible.
16. “I’m too busy.”
You might be overloaded, but this can sound like your work matters more than theirs. It also doesn’t give the other person anything to work with. A clearer response is to state your current priorities and possible constraints, and offer a realistic time to revisit their request.
17. “It’s just common sense.”
Calling something common sense implies that anyone who missed it lacks basic competence. That can embarrass people and reduce trust, even if you didn’t mean it that way. Even if something seems obvious to you, explain it briefly and move on without belittling someone or making it personal.
18. “I don’t care.”
This one is tough to come back from once it’s out there. Even if you mean you don’t have a preference, it can sound like you’re indifferent to the team or the outcome. Say what does matter most to you, like the goal, the timeline, or the quality bar.
19. “That’s not fair.”
Fairness matters, but this phrase can come across as emotional without being actionable. It can also put the other person on the defensive, especially if you don’t clarify what feels unfair. If you raise it, pair it with specifics and a request for what would make the situation more equitable.
20. “I’m bored.”
Saying this at work can give others a bad impression of you right off the bat, and it can be insulting to the people who prepared the meeting, training, or project. It may also suggest you’re not taking your time or responsibilities seriously. If you’re disengaged, ask for clearer goals, more context, or a way to contribute meaningfully instead.
