One pillar of a long-lasting relationship is compatibility between the sheets. If things have gone a bit stale lately, just know that’s natural! It’s easy to fall into a routine, but it’s just as easy to bring back the spice. Here are 20 simple ways to kick your relationship into high gear.
1. Explore Your House
Don’t restrict yourselves to the bedroom! You have an entire home at your disposal, and introducing a new location is an exciting endeavor. The living room floor, the hallway, or even the kitchen counter are all calling your name.
Photo by Katsia Jazwinska on Unsplash
2. Try Sensory Play
Build anticipation (and arousal) with sensory play. This can include items like blindfolds, a feather tickler, or ice cubes to learn more about what your partner likes. Heightened sensory experiences can also bring out the thrill of what’s to come.
Photo by Tomáš Lištiak on Unsplash
3. Play Games
Did you know there are board games catered to couples? There are couples’ dice. Card games, too. You can easily incorporate one of these into the bedroom for suggestions on how to spice things up—all while having fun!
Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash
4. New Moves
Sometimes the answer is as simple as trying something new. Be bold and explore different positions you think could be fun.
Photo by Becca Tapert on Unsplash
5. Build a List
Sit down with your partner and put together a list of fantasies. You then have a starting point for what you’d like to try, and you learn a little something about your partner, too.
Photo by AllGo - An App For Plus Size People on Unsplash
6. Watch Movies Together
There’s a plethora of entertainment out there, plenty of which is available for free. Sit down one night and watch a movie together; they’re an exciting way to learn and explore new things together.
Photo by Glenn Carstens-Peters on Unsplash
7. Introduce Toys
Some may look intimidating, but toys are meant for the mutual pleasure of you and your partner. With endless shops and options to choose from, look into which ones offer the stimulation you’re after.
Photo by Travis Grossen on Unsplash
8. Go On Dates
Sometimes, a better connection in the bedroom has nothing to do with what goes on under the sheets. Carve out some quality time with your partner and you may be surprised at just how close it brings you.
Photo by Clay Banks on Unsplash
9. Book a Room
A surefire way to get close is with a staycation. Time together in a hotel gives you a break from the everyday chaos of your lives. You’re relaxed, room service is only a button away, and there’s a nice mattress just waiting for you.
Photo by Andrew Neel on Unsplash
10. Send Spicy Texts
Get your partner’s blood pumping with a provocative text during the day. This can include anything from a photo to a little written window into what you have in store for them. The suspense only builds the longer you have to wait for each other.
Photo by Jonas Leupe on Unsplash
11. Make Noise
Time together brings its fair share of noise already, but spice things up by making an extra effort. Whisper your partner’s name or talk to them during the deed to really get things moving.
Photo by Jp Valery on Unsplash
12. Communicate
Your partner will only know what you want—and how you want it—if you tell them. Keep the lines of communication open and you might surprise yourselves with how much better things get.
Photo by John Schnobrich on Unsplash
13. Focus on You
A big part of bringing your A-game comes from how you feel. Pamper yourself beforehand! Take a nice long bath, buy some new undergarments, or do whatever you need to feel your best. That energy channels into the bedroom.
Photo by Huy Nguyen on Unsplash
14. Read Together
Spicy material doesn’t just come from the movies. Spark inspiration from any number of books or online stories together. You might like what you read!
Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash
15. Roleplay
Diving into a new persona is a tried and true way to spice things up. Meet your partner at a bar and pretend you’re strangers. Discuss fantasies together before you reenact them. You can be whoever you want, making the possibilities for pleasure just about endless.
Photo by Andrea Peperó on Unsplash
16. Mirror, Mirror…
A simple way to spice things up is probably in your bedroom as we speak: the mirror. Engagement in front of a mirror allows you both a chance to see what’s working, how well it’s working, and experience each other in a whole new way.
17. Extra Gear
If it’s something you’re willing to try, items like handcuffs or rope can be a thrilling addition to the bedroom. Surrendering autonomy for the night is a good way to show you trust your partner…with whatever they have in mind.
Photo by Christopher Jolly on Unsplash
18. Make a Playlist
A new way to set the mood can be through a mutual playlist. Sit down together and make a playlist of songs that get your motors running. You can also make separate playlists and take turns on whose plays.
Photo by Ruijia Wang on Unsplash
19. Get Messy
Food is a simple and effective way to keep things spicy. Whipped cream, chocolate sauce, and the classic strawberry are all perfect ways to kick off the adventure…and if things get a little messy, the shower is always right there.
Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash
20. Speak With a Professional
Sometimes the most meaningful way to improve your time together is with a third party. Perhaps you or your partner have some unresolved feelings about the issue. Maybe a therapist has ideas you’ve never thought of. Whatever the case may be, a session or two with a qualified professional can put you both on the right track to a better night together.
