20 Toxic Traits Holding You Back From A Healthy Relationship


20 Toxic Traits Holding You Back From A Healthy Relationship


Not all relationships are perfect, but it's important that you also don't overlook certain negative traits. Sometimes, it's hard to see the problems in your relationship for yourself, so we want to teach you all the bad signs to look out for so you can protect yourself and your well-being. Here are 20 toxic traits that might be holding you back from a healthy relationship.


1. Gaslighting

Gaslighting is an incredibly toxic trait that doesn't belong in any relationship. It undermines the most important foundation of any relationship: trust. It makes the other person question their reality and feelings when their experiences and emotions are constantly being denied.

Argument-6080057 1280Image by Mohamed Hassan from Pixabay

Advertisement

2. Insecurity

Insecurity can manifest in many different ways; sometimes it shows as a constant need for reassurance while other times, it's repeatedly questioning your partner's commitment without cause.

Advertisement

This is one toxic trait that can strain any relationship, creating an environment filled with mistrust and constant validation-seeking rather than a loving and supportive one.

Worried-Girl-413690 1280Image by Ryan McGuire from Pixabay

Advertisement

3. Overly Nagging

If you already hate the nagging you get from your parents, it's so much worse when you also get it from your significant other.

Advertisement

Persistent nagging will slowly break the foundation of any relationship by building resentment and frustration. It shifts the healthy dynamic from supportive to parental, diminishing one's sense of autonomy.

Woman-4620433 1280Image by Engin Akyurt from Pixabay

Advertisement

4. Avoiding Difficult Conversations

Everyone hates having tough conversations, but avoiding them is a toxic trait that prevents growth. Doing this hides any underlying issues that are creating problems in your relationship.

Advertisement

It also creates a barrier to intimacy and closeness, allowing unresolved conflicts to fester and slowly break the bond you two share.

Man-2915187 1280Image by Lukas_Rychvalsky from Pixabay

Advertisement

5. Being Defensive Immediately

No one wants to talk to someone who immediately shuts down or gets defensive, especially when one is trying to provide constructive feedback. It shows an unwillingness to understand or empathize with your partner's perspective, revealing a major problem in one's communication and problem-solving skills.

Advertisement

Karate-2578819 1280Image by svklimkin from Pixabay

Advertisement

6. Stonewalling

Stonewalling is when your partner completely withdraws from a conversation or interaction. It's done to avoid confrontation, but in doing so, you're stopping the problem-solving process too. It leaves issues unresolved and can make both partners feel disconnected, undervalued, and frustrated.

Wall-1172646 1280Image by Jeon Sang-O from Pixabay

Advertisement

7. Being Jealous for No Reason

Jealousy is a very ugly toxic trait, especially when it's done without basis.

Advertisement

Unfounded jealousy is an evident sign of trust issues and a lack of security in a relationship. It can lead to controlling behaviour and unwarranted suspicion, making the other partner feel disrespected.

Jealous-8493844 1280Image by Markus Winkler from Pixabay

Advertisement

8. Expecting Them to Know What You're Thinking

Unless you happen to have the gift of reading minds, how can you expect someone else to understand what you're thinking if you don't say anything?

Advertisement

This expectations set an unrealistic standard that only fosters frustration and disappointment. It unfairly places the burden of understanding on the other partner, making them feel stressed and annoyed. 

Heartsickness-428103 1280Image by Tú Anh from Pixabay

Advertisement

9. Overly Criticizing

While constructive criticism can help maintain a healthy relationship, constant criticism has the reverse effect: it can diminish the partner's self-esteem and sense of worth.

Advertisement

It might ruin any concept of open communication within the relationship, even going as far as breaking mutual respect.

Man-3864064 1280Image by Ольга Фоломеева from Pixabay

Advertisement

10. Being Closed Off to New Experiences

It's okay to be shy and enjoy your own comforts, but if you're constantly resisting new experiences, especially ones your partner is interested in or loves to do, it can stagnate a relationship's growth pretty quickly.

Advertisement

If you're unwilling to participate in opportunities for shared adventures and new learning, the relationship can become boring and lead to dissatisfaction on both ends.

Sadness-4383914 1280Image by Victoria from Pixabay

Advertisement

11. Being Constantly Negative

No one loves a Negative Nancy, and when you're in a relationship, it can drain all the energy and happiness out of it.

Advertisement

This toxic trait leaves behind a gloomy atmosphere that can make it difficult to enjoy each other's company.

Silhouette-315915 1280Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay

Advertisement

12. Reckless Behavior

Reckless behaviour when you're showing a disregard for your partner's well-being and the relationship's health can be a dangerous one. It can put both partners in stressful situations or even ruin trust, which definitely isn't worth the consequences if it's something that could have been easily avoided with more caution.

Advertisement

Resentment-5189363 1280Image by Victoria from Pixabay

Advertisement

13. Temper Issues

Not being able to control your temper creates an environment of fear or walking on eggshells for the other partner. It's incredibly disruptive when it comes to healthy communication, and can even lead to emotional or physical harm. It's a major red flag that can't be overlooked, especially if your partner isn't interested in improving it.

Advertisement

Angry-Man-274175 1280Photo by Ashish_Choudhary on Pixabay

Advertisement

14. Not Thinking About How Things Affect Your Partner

When you're in a serious relationship, you have to start thinking about how your actions not only affect you, but your partner too. Failing to consider your partner's feelings or how what you do impacts them too, shows a lack of empathy and respect. This is a selfish perspective that can lead to plenty of arguments, hurt feelings, and resentment.

Advertisement

Sad-4207079 1280Image by Hamed Mehrnik from Pixabay

Advertisement

15. Growing Lazy

While mild laziness might be a sign of a comfortable relationship, if you become too complacent, it might come off as a lack of investment. This can be a toxic trait that leads to stagnant relationships and one where one or both partners feel neglected or underappreciated.

Advertisement

Woman-3355957 1280Image by Robin Higgins from Pixabay

Advertisement

16. Manipulative

Manipulation in any form—whether emotional, financial, or psychological—is a betrayal of trust. It seeks to control or twist the partner's actions and feelings for selfish gains, eroding the mutual respect and honesty vital for a healthy relationship.

Frustrated-4201046 1280Image by Steve DiMatteo from Pixabay

Advertisement

17. Setting Too High of Expectations

No matter what you do, it's never a good idea to set too high of an expectation.

Advertisement

Unrealistically high expectations in a relationship can put unwanted stress and pressure on the other partner, which only leads to disappointment. It's important that you have goals and ambitions, but they should always be balanced with understanding.

Girl-6059889 1280Image by Hieu Van from Pixabay

Advertisement

18. Not Apologizing Sincerely

If you made a mistake, apologize! If your partner is somehow unable to offer a sincere, genuine apology, it only demonstrates that they have a lack of accountability and respect for the other's feelings.

Advertisement

Proper apologies are important and they're key to healing and moving forward in any relationship.

Woman-1867127 1280Image by Pexels from Pixabay

Advertisement

19. Doesn't Own Up to Their Faults

Don't be stubborn - own up to your mistakes! Refusing to acknowledge one's own faults is a dangerous trait that prevents personal growth, but also relationship growth. It fosters an environment of blame and defensiveness rather than one with open communication.

Advertisement

Woman-863686 1280Image by Foundry Co from Pixabay

Advertisement

20. Two-Faced Behavior

Being two-faced, or acting differently behind your partner's back, undermines the trust and integrity of the relationship. Honesty and consistency are cornerstones of a strong, healthy partnership, without which the relationship can become superficial and insecure.

Friends-536896 1280Image by ErikaWittlieb from Pixabay

Advertisement