The 10 Most Infuriating Traits In A Partner & The 10 Most Valued
The Worst and Best Traits in a Partner
For good and bad, relationships don’t come with a manual, and it’s easy to get distracted from what—or who—is really important. This is when it helps to have a reminder of the dos and don’ts of being in a relationship, so you know how to be the best possible partner. Here are the 10 most annoying traits in a partner and the 10 most valued.
1. Negativity
Sure, everyone has bad days, but excessive negativity can really put a damper on the relationship. You and your partner should enjoy spending time together. If either of you are constantly pessimistic, it can be draining and your relationship can sour.
2. Clinginess
It’s nice to feel wanted or even needed, but when your partner gives the impression that they can’t function without you, it can be overwhelming. It’s a sign of insecurity that may result in the relationship feeling one-sided or burdensome.
3. Jealousy
It’s natural to feel a pang of jealousy from time to time when you see your partner or crush talking to someone else. However, excessive jealousy can tarnish a relationship, adding tension and making your partner feel overly restrained.
4. Lack of Communication
Sharing your life with someone can be complicated and you won’t always be able to gauge what your partner is thinking or feeling. This is why good communication is so key to a successful relationship. Poor communication can lead to misunderstanding, frustration, and conflict.
5. Being Self-Centered
No one likes a narcissist, especially when it comes to relationships. It’s important to cater to your partner’s needs and not just think about yourself. Being too self-absorbed can be incredibly damaging as it makes your partner feel under-appreciated.
6. Dishonesty
One of the main pillars of a healthy relationship is trust. Without it, you lack a strong foundation. Deceitful behavior hurts your partner and causes a relationship to break down, sometimes irreparably. It’s always best to be honest, even when it’s hard.
7. Controlling Behavior
Being in a relationship shouldn’t feel like shackles. Not only is controlling behavior a sign of distrust, but it can also feel suffocating and oppressive. Threatening, gaslighting, invading privacy, and being overly accusatory are just some of the forms.
8. Being Preoccupied
We all get lost in thought sometimes, especially during times of stress. However, being constantly unreachable while spending quality time with your partner is just plain annoying and can weaken your bond.
9. Laziness
In more aspects than one, laziness is an unattractive quality. For example, it can result in housework falling on one person, which is disrespectful and unfair. A lack of motivation in other aspects of life, like work, can be a roadblock to getting ahead, which can make your partner wary of a future together.
10. Inflexibility
Relationships are inevitably full of compromise. Being too stubborn or unadaptable makes it very hard to resolve conflict and coexist happily as a couple.
Now that we’ve covered the most annoying traits in a partner, let’s talk about ones that make sparks fly.
1. Trustworthiness
Being an honest and reliable partner is incredibly important. When trust is built, both parties feel secure and valued and the relationship will have the strength to weather all the storms life throws at it.
2. Empathy
Genuine empathy feels like a warm hug. It fosters a safe space where your partner can share their deepest thoughts—all while feeling seen and cared for.
3. Sense of Humor
You don’t need to be a comedian to have a good sense of humor. It’s more about making light of what life throws at you. By not taking yourself too seriously, you and your partner can brush off hardships and have a bit of fun.
4. Supportiveness
Life throws all kinds of curveballs and in moments of stress, it’s important to have a supportive partner. Having someone who believes in you is not only motivating, but it also grows self-confidence.
5. Respectfulness
No one likes to feel disrespected, especially by those they love most. Finding that place of mutual respect is validating, builds trust, and helps healthy relationships to develop.
6. Affection
Every couple has a different threshold when it comes to physical affection. Some couples constantly touch while others are more reserved. In any case, affection is important to show you care and help build that connection.
7. Loyalty
Loyalty through good times and bad shows full commitment to the relationship. It makes your partner feel supported and builds trust, further strengthening your bond.
8. Independence
It’s always nice to see your partner do something they're passionate about. Having individual interests, and the space to do them is important in any relationship.Independence lets you flourish and creates a supportive foundation.
9. Patience
All great things take time—building trust, strength, and love in a relationship doesn’t happen overnight, and patience is an underrated skill necessary for building a lasting relationship.
National Cancer Institute on Unsplash
10. Communication Skills
Good communication skills are essential for a strong relationship. Communicating effectively creates a safe space where you and your partner feel validated, fosters a deeper connection, and helps avoid and resolve conflict.
